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Today In “Blame Millennials For Everything”, Apparently Bud Heavies Aren’t As Popular As They Used To Be

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Today in “blame millenials for absolutely fucking everything”, Business Insider has reported that millenials have “brought about the downfall of one of America’s most iconic beer brands”.

Apparently, Miller Lite topped Budweiser in a list of the top beer brands by US sales in 2017, which caused the King of Beers to slide back into the four slot. Bud Lights are still (and probably will always be) the top selling beer in these great United States, but MillerCoors now occupies the #2 and #3 slots with Coors Light and Miller Lite, respectively.

If you know Papa Dom, you know he’s a Miller Lite guy. Always have been, always will be. Do I love a good New England IPA or something on the more adventurous and crafty side now and again? Absolutely, my guy. Do I enjoy ripping a sixer of Miller Lite tallboys on Monday nights with my buddies around the D&D table significantly more? Hell yes.

budweiser

Beer industry analysts (read: idiots) blame millennials’ lack of interest in “big beer” companies for the backslides, but I don’t see your favorite 8.9% Oatmeal Stout making it’s way into the Billboard Beer Cold 100 anytime soon. Not for nothing though, Budweiser is still fucking great. Who doesn’t love a couple Bud Diesels on a hot summer day? I know I do. Furthermore, Budweiser still has the best beer commercials in the game. I don’t see your local brewery making the masses cry over a commercial with Clydesdale horses in it year after year during the Super Bowl.

The dumbest shit about this is that Bud’s figures are being compared to it’s “interest” and ability to “captivate a market” in the 1980’s. Beer is a whole different game than it was back then, my g. The dingleberrries who report beer analytics might have you believing that Bud Heavies aren’t here to stay, but as long as degenerates like us exist, we’ll make sure that doesn’t happen. Hail to the King, baby.

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