We’re in the business of writing short, easy to read, and hopefully funny blogs. So I’m not here to give you guys a blog post of 25 things that you should not do at PAX East, in 12 point Times New Roman in a clean MLA format. I probably could based on the shit I’ve seen over the past few years of covering this con. You are instead going to get a blog, written by a normal person (at least I’d like to think), telling you five things that you should not do at the convention.
Do Not, Not Shower and Wear Deodorant
Every year it has to be said. If you can smell yourself, so can other people. If you can’t move without getting a whiff of a barn animal, you smell bad. If you constantly think there is an Italian sub with all the toppings following you around, you are the one that smells like onion and deli meats. Just throw some soap and water on yourself, throw deodorant under your pits, and you’re fine. It’s literally that easy.
Buy Convention Food
You are in an area of Boston that has food on every block. Thai food, American bar food, Mexican food, Italian food, fast food, deli sandwiches and probably any other kind you can think of. You can find it so close. Instead of buying a fucking hot dog and bag of popcorn for $15 at the convention, venture out a little. A lot of people are from out of town, and I might be a little biased, but Boston is awesome. And the convention is right by Seaport, which is pretty much the Dubai of Boston. See the city, try some new stuff. It’s a long day, so eat something of substance.
Fall in Love
It won’t work out. They’re probably from 5000 miles away and you’ll never see them again. And might be a Furry on the side. Treat the weekend as a good time, not a long time.
Just Randomly Stop Short
Pet peeve city right here. Nothing shows how clueless someone is than not noticing their surroundings. You’re in a packed venue, with people rubbing elbows and others trying to dip, duck, dive, and dodge their way through the crowd. If you see something that catches your eye, or have to look down to your phone, pull off to the side. Imagine if you were driving and every time you saw something cool on the side of the road you slammed on your breaks. It’s selfish and dangerous. If I get my teeth pushed in because someone stops short I’ll snap. And so will many other people who aren’t airheads.
Be An Asshole Sober or Drunk
Both must be touched on. People are dickheads sometimes and it ruins others times around you. If you are a type of savage that IRL streams, here’s a tip. You don’t have to be obnoxious. The camera and your friends hear you, stop screaming. Go outside if you want to do that, not at the hotel bar. And speaking of bars. Tip your servers and bartenders. They hate this weekend as it is because of some pieces of shit that show up at the con. And if you’re the worst drunk to be around, know your limits. Have fun for sure, but don’t be a drunk asshole that makes people want to crack you.
Have fun, be safe, and shower.