It’s the first day of Pax and I’m already very tired. My legs hurt, I’m dehydrated, and it smells like a barn in here. But you know what I’m even more tired of? Tom Nook’s shit. He’s been cheating me, and others around the world out of their hard earned bells for years. Pulling weeds for free, while you sat in Nook’s Cranny making a killing. And I will not stand for it anymore. I got my chance, and I let him know what was on my mind.
Crook! Good for nothing thief! When I scolded Tom, the Nintendo employees heads snapped around and jaws smashed the ground. They couldn’t believe their eyes and ears. Someone with the balls to call out Mr. Nook, face to face. The biggest villain to ever walk this Earth was faced by a journalist at Pax East. And what did he do? Scurried away like the bitch that he is.
Side note: Who ever was inside of the Tom Nook costume, and to all employees of Nintendo. I apologize for screaming. But I do not regret my actions. It just had to be done.
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