In case you missed it, BioWare premiered gameplay from its new IP, Anthem, during Microsoft’s E3 presser yesterday.
The trailer showcases a post-apocalyptic world that’s densely populated with savage monsters, insane looking weather conditions, and other aggressive creatures that seem to be making life a living hell for the humans who found refuge in their city behind a giant wall. Check that shit out right here, and then let’s have a little chat about it. I wanna see if you noticed the one thing that bothered me about the trailer.
Anthem’s graphics, sound direction, and animations all look stellar. The Javelins (those area the supersuits’ names) look super slick and I can’t wait to pilot one for myself. So what’s the problem Dom? I’ll tell you what’s the problem… The fucking fake scripted corny co-op banter that’s been drenching far too many gameplay trailers for far too long. People don’t sound like that, Bioware. Nobody’s gonna be talking strategically and calmly while playing Anthem’s multiplayer. Throw me, Rob, and Chris in a room with Anthem for 2 hours and 30 Coors Lights and I guarantee your gameplay trailer will be 1000x more entertaining. I need to see a co-op trailer with real people that’re gonna be shooting their buddies in the ass, tea bagging corpses, swearing the paneling off their living room walls, and burping and screaming insults at friends and strangers alike. No more of this scripted chicken shit bullshit, I just want me some authentic gameplay. Is that too much to ask?
- Handicapping Tiggy’s Beer Mile - September 8, 2023
- The Guard Will Miss VCT Americas After Failing To Do Paperwork On Time… Wait What? - August 29, 2023
- Destiny 2: The Final Shape’s Reveal Trailer Proves That Nobody Tugs The Heartstrings Quite Like Bungie - August 25, 2023