25 Things Nintendo Absolutely Isn’t Going To Do For Super Mario RPG’s 25th Anniversary

Nintendo is holding their first full Nintendo Direct presentation since 2019 tomorrow.

More importantly, it’s the 25th anniversary of my favorite video game of all time in just a few short weeks.

That’s right, ladies and gentlemen. March 9th is the 25th anniversary of Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars. And to commemorate this incredible anniversary for my favorite game of all time – I have decided to write the most bitter (yet most correct) blog in the history of this website. I’ve compiled a definitive list of the 25 things that Nintendo is absolutely NOT*** going to do in observance of this milestone.

CUE THE MUSIC!


  1. Super Mario RPG gets a full remaster
  2. Super Mario RPG get an actual sequel
  3. Super Mario RPG is added to Nintendo Switch Online’s offering of digital SNES games
  4. Nintendo holds a commemorative Post Malone concert for Super Mario RPG’s 25th anniversary
  5. Mallow is added to Smash
  6. Geno is added to Smash
  7. Mallow is added to Mario Kart
  8. Geno is added to Mario Kart
  9. A Super Mario RPG Forest Maze playset is released for the Mario LEGO toy line
  10. “Year of Croco” season of content is announced
  11. Culex assist trophy is added to Smash
  12. Super Mario RPG-themed Animal Crossing furniture is announced
  13. Star Road is mentioned ever again in any Mario title
  14. Super Mario RPG Burger King toys
  15. Nintendo announces a Booster’s Castle Train Set Hot Wheels Track
  16. Partnership with Peeps brand to create Mallow-shaped marshmallow Peeps
  17. Toadofsky spinoff rhythm game where you make songs by jumping on Tadpoles
  18. The Chancellor of the Mushroom Kingdom is never referenced again, as he was an empty suit and government puppet
  19. Bring back Jonathan Jones, literally the second coolest character in the entire game (he’s a shark pirate you guys)
  20. Return us to such iconic locales as Rose Town, Seaside Town, or Booster’s Tower
  21. Add a real life Forest Maze to the Super Mario theme park
  22. Create another game where Mario and Bowser are forced to team up to defeat a greater evil
  23. Ever partner with Square Enix again on anything
  24. Announce another Mario roleplaying game that doesn’t have anything to do with stationery or art supplies
  25. Acknowledge the game’s existence whatsoever at tomorrow’s Nintendo Direct

And there you have it. Never gonna happen***. Ever***.

But if it did happen, literally any of these things…

I’d probably cry.

***DISCLAIMER: In the unlikely event that any of these things actually occur, I reserve the right to claim that I knew this was going to happen all along, and to act as though I had full confidence it was going to happen from day one. Thank you for your time.

Papa Dom

Co-Founder at Wicked Good Gaming
Dom Mahoney is Wicked Good Gaming's resident graphic designer, degenerate journalist, and co-host/super producer of Not Another Gaming Podcast. When not talking about games on the internet, you can find him yelling about New England sports, exploring breweries, and perfecting his chicken wing recipes.

Papa Dom

Dom Mahoney is Wicked Good Gaming's resident graphic designer, degenerate journalist, and co-host/super producer of Not Another Gaming Podcast. When not talking about games on the internet, you can find him yelling about New England sports, exploring breweries, and perfecting his chicken wing recipes.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *